Your New Neighbors
What can I do if my neighbors don’t like me?
Sometimes conflict occurs between homeowners and renters in a neighborhood, oftentimes because the two households do not have a good communication system developed to assist them in cooperatively resolving their dispute and/or people do not know what their legal responsibilities are as Charleston neighbors.
The most common types of homeowner/renter conflicts are:
Noise and nuisance complaints
Parking problems
Occupancy concerns
Animal disturbances
Property maintenance issues
Safety issues, such as speeding cars
Getting to know people who seem different than you can be challenging even to the most outgoing neighbor, so here are some tips to increase understanding and tolerance amongst neighbors:
If approaching a neighbor with a problem, do so when you’re not angry. If you assume positive intention and act respectful in your communication, it is more likely that your neighbor will be willing to hear you out and help resolve the problem.
Watch your verbal and body language; being perceived as patronizing or irate can really damage communication. Try not to use inflammatory language that will put people on the defensive.
Stay calm and keep your voice level - most times people will mirror your behavior. Try to smile, if possible; offer other friendly gestures so the neighbor will remain open to hearing you out.
Maintain a safe and respectful distance by using the Effective communication Formula: listen openly, state what you see/hear, re-frame negative language, acknowledge the perspective of others, and tell the neighbor what you’d like to see happen.
Remember that everyone has a story, and sometimes that story is contributing to the problem. If you are willing to try and understand the other person’s perspective, you may be able to help each other resolve your individual and shared problems. And you might even make a new friend/ally in the process!
Bottom line is: You can teach others how to treat you. If you’re feeling ganged up against because you are a renter in a mostly owner-occupied neighborhood, try to get invested in the well-being of the area. The old saying “if you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em” seems to work well in mixed neighborhoods.
Good luck!
